Humbling Blog Posts
I'm not on the program, not on the therapy track with my blog. I've not been using it as a foil for my venting, my angst repository. And that's not because I've been living a totally carefree life, I'm not. Things have been pretty good, Paula and I have enjoyed each other's company as always. There's some angst amongst us because we don't have a place locked down and ready to inhabit yet. But we're working on that and, fingers crossed, we'll be closing on a nice little spot not far from my old house. A cozy little 1 bed, 1.5 bathroom two story apartment place with good light, good storage and not so expensive that we'll have to leverage our future for our present.

But really, overall things are going well, I slipped up on my meds and allowed the cold sore to come back before it had fully gone away so I'm pissed off about that, there's a ton of bills to sort out and pay (though I'm starting to automate all of that and that's good stuff). And I don't really have the time to write as I should be, I can steal an hour or two at night sometimes, after Paula's crashed out. But its hard to write with her there and awake. She needs her life to be up here because she's bored some of the time and her boredom means its up to me to keep her entertained. Or try to. But this week will be a big and busy one for work and very much so for the personal side of things. Next Monday will be a very different world up here for the both of us. And hopefully we'll be putting together our living space instead of mashing much of her stuff into storage.

And then there's the whole wedding plan stuff that's been temporarily put on hold as we focus on living arrangement stuff. But that will have to start taking some precedence again soon too. Way too much to do there that it can't be left to lie for long.

Anyway, I've not been using my blog to discuss personal topics of deep important lately, unlike Layne (though her server's buggered right now and I get the page less than half the time) who continually humbles and astounds me with her self analysis and open exposure. And I'm reminded that my writing can have more poignancy if I let it run on its own some. But for now I've gotta get my work world rolling, there's tons to do this week in the short week.

Joe Lame TV News
I'm sure much of America was thoroughly satisfied with the storybook joy ending to Joe Millionaire last night (though I'm sure the tell-all expose show next week'll help the folks who need more). But I was kind of bored by it, really. And I think I understand why some. We also happened to watch High Fidelity with John Cusack and his final monologue in the movie is about fantasy girls and reality and finally realizing that the girl you know and love and understand and who has all these problems or issues or whatever is no different from the fantasy girl, only the fantasy girl is still the unknown. Once you get up close to her, you can see the cracks in the veneer, the smudged lipstick in the corner of her mouth, her piles of dirty laundry, the pumps she snapped the heel off of the night before. She becomes real, she loses the fantasy aspect and some people start searching for the next fantastical experience to carry them away from the reality of the moment and the causality of facing it. A valuable lesson and one that I've been thinking about ever since, I'm glad I saw the movie for that reason alone.

Was anyone surprised in the least when the pudgy butler guy gave them a check for a million bucks? Nah, neither was I.