Playing into Their Hands

There are numerous irritating people in the news on a daily basis. People that have no particular expertise save self-promotion and aggressive PR firms behind them.

The queen bee of these types has got to be Sarah Palin, a disturbing mix of beauty and fervently clung to ignorance with some ego, bravado and venality tossed in for good measure. She's excellent at whipping up a crowd into a frothy frenzy of parroted talking points that have no bearing in reality but answer already held beliefs by her adherents.

The response to justifiable criticisms against her proclaimations is that people hate her because she's strong. Of course this is total bullshit. People hate her because she's factually incorrect most of the time, adds nothing to the national debate stage and actually goes a long, long ways towards undermining any partisan legislation efforts with her divisive and, let's be honest, hate-based rhetoric.

As I wrote in a comment on a recent article on SFGate about her outrage at the Family Guy for poking fun at her, her outrage is uncannily selective. She demanded Rahn Emmanuel's resignation when he used the word "retarded" once, for which he's publicly apologized. Yet when Rush Limbaugh uses the same word more than 40 times on his show, he gets a free pass because he was using it as satire. Her rage is false, her beliefs are opinions, her presence on the national political scene is little more than a distraction from the real problems at hand.

And I think that's why people like Sarah Palin bother me so much. She's not trying to help put America back on track, she's out there hunting speaking fees, whipping up opposition to legislation our country desperately needs and spewing lies and propoganda regardless of how often she is proved to have no idea what she's talking about.

Another person on the national political landscape that does nothing but slow down or obfuscate real issues is Michelle Bachman of Minnesota. I seriously think this woman is a part time nutter at best and a full time loony at worst. She regularly makes up facts to support her chosen perspective (or the perspective chosend for her by the GOP "leadership") and her words do nothing but fan a fire of fucking fools (sorry about that).

I'm sure both Bachmann and Palin think they are patriots. Or maybe they don't, maybe if they were to be honest they'd admit that they are out for nothing more than notoriety, speaking fees and to be the sand in the vaseline of the nation. Or, more likely, the sand in the lube of Democratic party.

Either way, they are hurtful towards America, they are divisive spirits without substance and their continued presence in national politics will do nothing to help get our nation back on track.

I know this blog post actually plays into their hands because they live for rancor directed at them, they feed off the anger they elicit in others and they love stirring up partisan fury based off their lies and intentional misrepresentations of reality. Which makes them dangerously close to traitors to the USA in my estimation. Lucky thing I'm not in charge, for them.

The Vetting Tapes Released!

I've just received an actual tape of the McCain campaign's call to meet/investigate Sarah Palin before offering her the vice presidency. This is, from all reports, the sum total of their contact before bringing her on board the Double Talk Express.

"Hi, is this Governor Palin?"

"You betcha! I wear lipstick and like earmarks unless you don't like earmarks and then I'll not like them again but only because you don't like them too. Oh and guns, I loooooove guns and shooting animals from airplanes in the air!"

"Heaven help me, your voice is like fingernails on a chalkboard fed through one of those roll & rock amplifiers the kids are so into. I understand you don't believe in global warming, evolution or the reality that Iraq is a colossal fucking mess that we're going to have a nightmare getting out of. How'd you like to be my vice president?"
Unintelligible squealing, hysterical guffaws and some gasps later, "That was a really funny joke, sir."

"No joke, your nasally voice combined with your extremist religious beliefs are just the smokescreen we need right now. The Democrats will shit themselves when I announce you, it'll be great and we can ride a wave of religious nuttery straight into the Oval Office."

"Oval Office?"

"Where the president works in the White House?" said the jowly old senior adulterer from Arizona.

"Oh, I thought you were referring to the toilet, hahaha," she laughed loudly, ironically like a braying donkey.

John McCain held the telephone at arm's length and grimaced.

"Before we go on, you don't have any skeletons in your closet I should know about? No ironic personal affairs that contradict your public statements or abuses of power? Say, how are you on foreign policy?"

"I've been to Canada and Mexico, how's that work? Oh wait, I can see Russia from my desk. And no, I'm an absolute saint, just ask any Alaskan, except those traitorous bastards who had the nerve disagree with me on anything, ever," replied the perky bespectacled zealot.

"You'll be perfect, the Democrats are going to have a nightmare figuring you out and reacting and the feminists are going to shit themselves. Good to have you aboard the Straight Talk Express," said McGrimace.

"Um, sir, do I have to be honest and forthright and truthful on the Straight Talk Express?"

"Oh, hell no, its a GOP thing, we name things the opposite of what they really are. Do
No Child Left Behind and the Patriot Act ring a bell? We like to name things so that the knuckleheads will think they're good when they're just the same old disgusting doublespeak the GOP's come to be known for," he answered without even a hint of shame.

"Thank goodness for that, sir, because I can't seem to tell the truth no matter how hard I try. And that was a lie too, I hope nobody starts counting them," she answered.

They exchanged a few more pleasantries, talked about shooting animals from planes and helicopters for fun, about how pro-choice is pro-sin and whether or not creationism should be taught alongside of or just replace evolution entirely in our schools.

The above is totally and absolutely true to the best of my knowledge and I'd swear on a stack of state emails printed out from Governor Palin's Yahoo! account to that end. Or not. Actually, yeah, probably not.

Image used with permission from the Gallery of the Absurd because 14 rocks. Go read and enjoy her entire blog and click her advertisements and leave her comments about how awesome she is.

Trying Not to Go There

I am having a hard time keeping off the politics right now. I'm pretty stirred up and more than a little pissed off. So far this election isn't about issues, its about rhetoric and sarcastic distraction.

Sarah Palin is not even close to being qualified for the position she's been nominated. It isn't about her being a woman, it isn't about her being a mother of a needy baby with medical issues, it isn't about her being a mother of a pregnant teenager.

It is the combination of her inexperience, her complete lack of international exposure, her religious beliefs, her denial of scientific findings (global warming and evolution being two easy ones), her pro-life/anti-choice beliefs and the overstuffed closet of scandals and misdeeds in her short political career thus far. Need more? Go read Think Progress' Sarah Palin Digest but it ain't pretty. In fact, the whole thing needs to be read by as many Americans as possible.

McCain has the experience but he's also got some deeply held beliefs that are poisonous to this nation. He openly hates the "gooks" who kept him captive and tortured him. He just barely dodged indictment for his deep involvement in the Keating Five scandal in the 90's. He has voted with Bush 90% of the time and has stated he could see the US in Iraq for 50 or 100 years. He's a Luddite who doesn't even begin to grasp the information age and he has absolutely no concept of the challenges facing the real middle class Americans (not the ones he calls middle class who make $5 million a year and only have three or four houses).

Electing John McCain and Sarah Palin won't change anything in this country. Sorry, it won't change anything for the better unless you were already on the money train. For the vast majority of Americans, the election of McCain/Palin will see their lives the worse for it. But they'll sure help the rich get richer, push more Americans into poverty, reduce the number of Americans with healthcare, keep stacking debt onto the national debt, keep disgracing our country abroad, entrench us even deeper in Iraq while Bin Laden STILLS WALKS FREE seven years after 9/11. Notice how nobody in the Republican Party even mentions him anymore?

The thought of four more years of the gutter politics we've labored under is almost too much to bear.

Okay, I promise a post about sunshine and happiness before any more doom and gloom politics. And I think I'll start posting short excerpts here and posting the full posts over on the mostly defunct IP Politik. Yes, I'll dust it off before starting the engine back up over there.