A Midsummer Night's Cheese

My for this week. Not overly inspired but sleep deprivation can tend to quell creativity, no?

1. What did you do on your summer vacation?
Made a baby, ripped up crabgrass, played with my dog on the beach, bought an SUV but I still plan to win the lottery, buy a block of apartments in Santa Cruz, buy a fleet of Hummers to use as drunk taxis and I want to open up a carnitas taco bar outside the hot spots to take advantage of drunk people with the munchies.

2. If you could stop time, what would you do?
I would definitely have a good time switching people's clothes on them. Put their shoes on the wrong feet, change a husband and wife's clothing, put people in compromising positions, get a really cool stereo and home theatre system, be a 15 year old boy and ogle hot chicks, add lots of hot sauce to people's food, switch salt for sugar, you know. Typical jack ass type stuff.

3. What is your hidden talent?
The first one that comes to mind is being able to whistle on both the exhale and inhale of breath, therefore, I can whistle continuously.

4. What's your dream house like?
It doesn't share a wall with an asshole who's main form of communication is yelling at everyone. It does have an atrium, a greenhouse, a covered deck area with a hot tub, a yard that doesn't slope and isn't succumbing to crabgrass, a bathroom with a nice big party tub as well as one of those cool porn style big glass enclosed showers, maybe even the kind with a fireplace that can be seen from the bathroom as well as the master bedroom, a view overlooking water, preferably the ocean but lakes and rivers can still apply, at least one wall of natural rock or a fireplace wall that can double as a climbing wall, lots of decks too, secret passages, hidden rooms, an attic, a basement, a walk in freezer as well as a restaurant style kitchen space, big garden areas out back, a barn and an underground hanger for my planes, boats and spaceships.

5. What's your favorite hand or arm gesture?
One I learned decades ago now from an old boyfriend of my mother's, remember Pat Colt, mom? Its called Bullshit and consists of folding your arms across each other with one end higher than the other. The high end has the index and pinky finger stuck out and the low end is flicking all the fingers open at once as if expelling something. No one ever gets it but it makes me laugh everytime I do it to someone when I think they're talking shit.

Actually, I rather enjoyed this nice small Cheddar X. Bite size isn't so bad after all!