Bow Down to Master Atkins

Or rather, Bow Out Idiot Atkins.

I don't know about the rest of the country (and maybe the world) but I've had just about enough of this whole incredibly stupid Atkins craze.

Carbs aren't the problem, fat isn't the problem, even protein isn't the problem.

The problem is pure basic gluttony. People want to have some doctor's say so to stuff their faces with whatever they want. A pork chop diet? Sure, if some quack signs off on it. How about an ice cream diet? Why not?

If you are overweight or just want to maintain yourself where you are then here's my easy to follow instructions. Figure out how many calories you burn in a typical day, there are plenty of places to do this online. Now, take that number and use that as your top plateau. Never go over it and your weight should stay where it is now. Add in some exercise (is it me or are more and more people becoming lazy couch potato bums who are almost scared to do anything physical?) and you'll not only lose some weight but you'll add some muscle tone which will make you look better, feel better and your body will work better.

The low carb stupidity is ridiculous. And people thinking they'll lose weight by getting the majority of their calories from protein and fat might lose some weight but at the expense of their heart's health and at the expense of their kidneys from having to work through all that protein.

Put down the spareribs, pick up your walking shoes and leave Atkins in your wake.

The other issue I have with this Atkins stupidity is that places like Kentucky Fried Chicken are running ads saying they are Atkins friendly when they sell fried chicken. FRIED CHICKEN! Let's get this laser straight and crystal clear here, fried chicken will kill you if you eat every day. Fried chicken is fat and protein with a little breaded coating. It tastes so good because its so incredibly bad for you. And Dale Earnhardt Jr.? You're a dirty filthy shill for selling your name to KFC. I hated Nascar before (come on, its cars driving in a big circle) and now I have even more reason to hate the retarded sport.