Inverted Dirt on Benny and Jenny
Sorry for the teaser, folks, I really didn't have enough time to write up the short story I heard the other day. There were some forty or fifty family members and friends milling about the house and it was just not possible to get some quiet time to write.

Anyway, with today's USA Today, I read that it was Benny who pulled the plug on Sunday's planned nuptuals so maybe this story was a prequel to the pending shutdown. Or perhaps its an utter load of dookie?

I heard a story told to me in confidence that I would muddle the details to protect some of the guilty so bear with me if the specifics aren't wholly forthcoming.

But enough hemming and hawing, let's get to the dirt.

Ben and Jen were out on the town one evening and, by the time they arrived at the bar in question, Ben was more than a few sheets to the wind and was having a hard time maintaining verticality. Upon entering the bathroom to drain his main vein, Ben happened upon one of the establishment's principles also releasing a few pent up beers. The conversation that ensued went something like this.
"Hey, what's up?" said Ben.
"Not too much, how you doin'?" said the barman.
"No, what's UP?"
"Not much, good to have you in town."
This went on for a few more rounds until the bar guy said something to the effect of "Ahh, not too much but perhaps you'd like to see some of the bar's special wines down in the cellar?"
A few minutes later and Ben was taking in some of the bar's less liquid and much more powdery offerings in the dark basement of the establishment.
Thusly fortified and apparently gaining a level of lucidity along with a Columbian powered buzz, Ben asked the guy to keep their little basement hijinks a secret from Jenny upstairs. Apparently, Ms. Lo doesn't really appreciate Ben's other proclivities.

Who knows how much of this is true or whether the events had any bearing on the recent disruption in the cosmic continuum that is the Hollywood love scene
or whether the realization that he had to live a lie to live his life had any impact on his decision to call a timeout on the wedding.

But it seemed plausible, my source was credible or he could have been entirely pulling my (and everyone else in the room's) leg. Who knows? But it certainly does add some grist to the mill.

[Update: Apparently part of the reason for the break up is that Benny's a momma's boy with a gambling problem. J. Lo-Ben Split Due To Gambling And Mom's Two Cents, Magazine Report Says. Oh yeah, maybe now people can get back to thinking about mildly more important things like the ongoing war of lies the government is using to smother the USA, the rabid Republican recall refutations, the three second mourning of John Ritter dropping dead on the set before continuing the show without him (not that it'll be any worse, Ritter wasn't funny, he was a mug for the camera but that still doesn't mean I'm overjoyed that he's dead) or Yoko Ono having her clothes cut off her for peace (though who in their right mind wants to see a 70 year old lady naked wasn't disclosed though I laud her efforts, however bizarre, to disrupt the ever growing cycle of violence the world over).]