Drunk and Jacking Off is No Way to Drive but it is apparently acceptable if you happen to also be an NBA star driving your Escalade drunk, jacking off to a porn being played on your dash video system and plowing into some dude's Suburban.
Congratulations, Minnesota Timberwolves' Eddie Griffin, you are officially the dumbest mother fucker in the country today. And one of the luckiest since the cops didn't test you for alcohol and drove you home instead of booking you for wildly trampling on the laws of decency.
Here's a hint, dude. Pull over, climb in the back and rock your cock for all your worth. And then pass out, you drunk idiot.
Be glad you didn't kill someone. This time.
By the way, thanks for helping me invent a new word, poron - a porn moron. And yes, that's you.
Tags: DUI, masturbating, Eddie Griffin, Minnesota, Timberwolves, porn + moron = poron
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