Fourteen Seconds

That's how long Elite XC's golden boy, Kimbo Slice, lasted against a last minute undercard stand-in for the injured Ken Shamrock. Seth Petruzelli was fighting on the undercard last night when word came down about the injury. He stepped up, stepped in and knocked Kimbo Slice out in 14 seconds.

And with his knockout by a legitimate MMA fighter, his golden glow should fade quickly as his starpower diminishes and he looks like what he is, a mid-30's brawler propped up by putting tomato cans in front of him to bash. Fans of MMA have long said that he would not be able to stand up with a "real" MMA fighter. Those fans have now been vindicated.

I knew things would go badly for Kimbo when I heard about the replacement. Shamrock's a good fighter, to be sure, but he's far past his prime where Petruzelli's younger, faster, stronger and hungrier. It wasn't even close to being a contest.

It will be interesting to watch the fallout from this knockout.

The MMA Freakshow's Next Make or Break Moment

Tomorrow night, Kimbo Slice, the casual fight fan's superstar and YouTube sensation, will step into the octagon against 44 year old (and not in the same way Randy Couture is 44 or 45) Ken Shamrock, who hasn't won a fight in four years nor made it out of the first round under his own power.

Elite XC needs Kimbo to keep winning or the promotion company will likely fail. They've already lost $56 million in the last two years and produced just Kimbo and Gina Carrano (who's a good fighter but let's face it, people want to watch her because she's hot).

Dan Wetzel, of Yahoo Sports, has a good write up of the event from the perspective of a fight fan. He adroitly points out that Kimbo's star will likely get smashed up against any UFC heavyweight in his prime, his skills are not going to markedly improve because of his age and his freakshow appeal will fail when he does face a real fighter who's not 44 years old and was done years ago (like Ken Shamrock most obviously is).

Kimbo is not a top flight fighter in MMA, he isn't even close to it. Ken Shamrock used to be one of the best fighters in the world but that was a long time ago and he's now a fading name who helps sell pay-per-view buys so people can watch him get knocked out again and again. If Kimbo beats him, he should be done. If he beats Kimbo, then Kimbo should be done. Either way, somebody needs to hang them up.

And if Kimbo loses then expect Elite XC to fold pretty soon thereafter. They've built whatever MMA brand they have on the back of an amateur freakshow instead of an up and coming real MMA star (because they seem to prefer signing with the UFC).

The Amateur Face of Professional Fighting

Kimbo Slice, the backyard bare-knuckle brawler who found fame on YouTube turned MMA star, has had his upcoming fight announced. He's going to fight UFC hall-of-famer elect and should have retired a couple of years ago but can't because of ego issues, Ken Shamrock.

Yes, the same Ken Shamrock who used to be an extraordinary fighter with awful whisker work (that's bad beard and facial hair). Yes, the same Ken Shamrock who got his ass resoundingly kicked by Tito Ortiz despite Tito's rapidly declining skills (which look far worse because of the equally rapid evolution of the rest of the sport) not once but twice. I have a ton of respect for what Ken Shamrock has done in his career as a mixed martial artist. But I have zero respect for this fight and I have little respect for Kimbo Slice if they keep giving him these lame duck fights. I mean, come on, look how old and tired Ken looks in the picture they're using to promote the fight! He looks like he skipped his nap for the photo shoot. And couldn't they airbrush some of that grey off him?

Kimbo Slice, aka Kevin Ferguson, has some fighting skills but there's a reason the promoters over at Elite XC aren't putting him in the octagon against real fighters in their prime. Because he will get his ass utterly kicked and the Elite XC's main draw will look like the low-end amateur fighter he really is.

Don't get me wrong, Kimbo can fight. He can kick the shit out of most anyone in a backyard brawl. But he's not fighting unprepared goombas in a backyard. Now he's supposed to be facing real MMA fighters. But so far he's been given tomato cans to pound on and even the tomato cans are giving him more fight than he can handle. So much so that many people think he might have actually lost his last fight to Thompson.

Ken Shamrock's best fighting days are long, long behind him but I bet he actually puts up a decent fight against Kimbo, if the fight goes longer than the first minute of the first round. Otherwise Kimbo will likely catch him with a looping overhand punch that will stun him enough for Kimbo to pound him out.

I’d like to see how Kimbo fares against a mid-level fighter in his prime. My bet would be that he gets the holy tar kicked right out of him. Which is why we won't see anything resembling a good fight for Kimbo anytime soon, Elite XC would be flushing one of their main paychecks down the toilet.

And Ken just needs to call it a career and ride off into the sunset to train his rising protégés or something.

Next up for discussion will be Brock "Don't Make Fun of My Stupid, Stupid, Stupid Hairstyle" Lesnar and his recent ass kicking of Heath Herring.