Twitter Follow or Block?

Twitter is still an evolving social network, it is slowly working out what it is all about and it will likely end up being different things for different users. There are the brain dead link bots that use it as a link dump, there are social commentary tweeps who post about everything, there are the social network connectors who use it as a 140 character news agency and report from shows and conferences and there are people who use it as a way to stay in touch with friends.

Because it happens with reassuring regularity, I've been slowly developing my set of rules for following someone back or blocking them or just ignoring them when they choose to follow me.

I will not be surprised in the least if my reasons for not following far outnumber my reasons for following.

So here are some of my evolving rules for a follow back on Twitter:
- Being a real person.
- Following less than a thousand people, otherwise you're a collector with an ulterior motive. The number of followers you have matters less to me but there's simply no way to interact with 15,000 people. Its stupid to think you can in any meaningful way.
- Describing yourself as a biker or cyclist.
- Being funny.
- Having interesting insights.

And some rules for not following or unfollowing and even blocking:
- Nothing but link dumps to drive traffic to your blog. I can understand and accept them on occasion but if that's all you do then I am just not interested.
- A horrid pic, come on, its an inch by inch image, put some effort into it.
- No bio or a bio url linking to a junk site.
- A social "experiment" account.
- No posts at all.
- A provocative pic/avatar and nothing but links to free laptop sites as posts.
- Any use of the words "marketing guru" in your bio.
- If you describe yourself as an "internet marketer".
- If your Tweet per day count is in the triple digits.
- Use of txtspk instead of real words.
- Tweeterhea, when you tweet like its going out of business, twenty, thirty or more tweets in a row.

And, sometimes, it doesn't matter if the follower doesn't tag any of these, sometimes they just seem to twitter about stuff that I'm not interested in. It isn't any slight against them. I'm sure the vast majority of my tweets are skipped right over by my followers, it doesn't make me tweet any less nor more interestingly. I tweet what's going on around me. That doesn't interest some, it maybe interests others. There's room for all kinds.

I'm sure this list will continue to evolve and change over time, just as Twitter is growing and changing. But this is a pretty good place to start. But, if you want to follow me, then be my guest just don't feel bad if I don't automatically return the favor.

What are the Twitter "rules" you abide by?

Celebrity "Laws"

Oprah's Law of Endorsement - If Oprah likes it and you do not then you are wrong.

Bill O'Reilly's Averation of Truth - The more Bill O'Reilly swears something is true, the less true it is.

Paris Hilton's Never Miss an Opportunity to Shill - Even when getting busted for a DUI she says she was just trying to get to In'n'Out (at least, I think she was shilling, maybe she was talking about hiring a gigolo).

The OJ Rule - If you get away with committing a heinous crime then it would behoove you to live a very, very clean life or you risk some extra heavy karmic payback. Witness OJ's "acquittal" for double murder and then very heavy hit for strong arm robbery. Payback is, most certainly, a bitch.

Naomi Campbell's Fearful Flying - Just stay the hell out of her way and keep the cocktails flowing and nobody gets hurt.

Joe Lieberman's Buttered Milquetoast - Never let a little thing like principals or party affiliation stand in the way of your ambition to ride someone else's coat tails.

Ten Commandments of Gift Buying for Children

I. Thou shalt ensure the inclusion of an off switch on noisy toys.
II. Thou shalt ensure a mute or quiet switch on noisy toys.
III. Thou shalt include an extra set of batteries.
IV. Thou deliverest loud instrument type toys only unto parents you do not like.
V. Thou shalt bequeath age appropriate toys, too young and boredom cometh, too old and frustration cometh.
VI.Thou shalt consider the size of the toy.
VII. Thou shalt seek permission before offering toys of war.
VIII. Knoweth that a toy that imparts annoyance in short order in the store will absolutely drive the parents crazy.
IX. Thou shalt consider younger siblings and refrain from purchasing toys with many small parts.
X. Thou shalt try to gift durable, useful and educational toys above others but books are good too.