I Know What Love Is...
It came to me this morning while I was showering for work, that being in love isn't a momentary event, its a forever sort of feeling. And inherent to it is the fact love carries beyond the present circumstances or situation. That love supercedes and trumps all other emotions when it really does become important.
Where this comes from is the fact that last night, I was in a bratty kind of mood, tired from work, tired of missing my girl all day long knowing she was never all that far away. While I was doing some work on the Powerbook, she was channel surfing which she normally cannot do as she gets a single channel in San Diego (yeah, the utter horror of it all!). And she was flipping back and forth between The Bachelorette on Fox Family, some gnarly medical rescue show on TLC and The Pet Pyschic on Animal Planet. All three drove me crazy but for different reasons.

The Bachelorette because its unutterably gay, lame and fake. In the same vein of Elimi-Date, this show throws people at each other, mixes in some fake romance and wants people to believe that its real, that this woman is going to whittle down 25 men to just one and he will be her perfect match for all eternity. Let's see, what's the public record for this trash? The Marry a Millionaire Show ended up in no marriage, a couple of Playboys shoots and another step up for our nation on the national embarassment scale (don't worry, France is still way out front). The Bachelor hasn't married his "perfect" woman yet, I'm sure there's plenty of pending litigation to wade through before the two star crossed lovers can be together, HA! And this last one (I'm sure I'm missing some other trashy get married after competing for him/her shows but I really don't care in the least) will likely result in the same murky resolution. They won't get married but they'll remain good friends. Yawn!

The nasty medical show was just gross really. I don't need to see a guy's intestine's. I don't need to see the result of domestic violence in long oozing gashes on a woman's (might have been a man's for all I know) backside. Or GSW #14 on the day (GSW = gun shot wound). Its just nasty. And the doctor's weren't all that hot like they are on ER.

The Pet Psychic was awful for lots of reasons but the primary one is that this faker, this charlatan of a woman is misleading people about their dead animals, or sick animals or whatever. She's preying on their vulnerabilities and exposing their emotional scars from their dead pets. I'm sure that she brought some comfort to the women (didn't see a single man on the show at all really) but its a false comfort. "Your dead cat is up in heaven with your mother and they are both so sad to know you're having trouble getting over her death" was one of things she said (close enough) to one crying woman. Why is this so wrong? To my mind, it presupposes way too much. Heaven is the same for animals as for humans? What if someone was allergic to cats while alive and they are cats in heaven? How's that work? And more so, she was presupposing the existence of heaven itself, a reality that cannot ever be visited until after death, at which point you can no longer pass along that knowledge to anyone else. Its a tremendously well thought out racket really. So no, the Pet Pyschic, while a curiosity, is just another person weaseling her way through life by preying on people in vulnerable moments. Pathetic and not very cool at all.

But let's try to get back on the path we started out on, it was a lovely tangent and all but let's focus again.

I realized that love transcends the moment. On Sunday when Paula was being a crazed freak (she'll readily admit it) when we were out shopping and I had to put my arms around her and physically restrain her from accidentally smacking other shoppers. I knew that thatmoment wasn't all of them, that I could carry my love through the trying (extremely minor example but I'm sure our future will test us better) moments and times. And that, yesterday, when I got irritated at eBay for not having a search engine to find category listings for sellers (another post for another time) and it wasn't helped by her fascination with the nasty shows on TV. Instead of really getting irritated, I wrapped up what I was doing online (posting two small auctions for shits and giggles, want to see them? click #1 and here's #2) and we went downstairs to make dinner with each other.

The skinny is that I love her beyond those moments when I'm peeved or she's being wacky or I'm being bratty or there's some other potentially mitigating factor. There are none, I love her, she loves me and its really as simple as that. Through thick and thin, in good times and bad, for better or for worse. And I wouldn't have it any other way. It was damned near impossible to leave this morning because I want to spend all my time with her. But she'll be there when I get home tonight and we'll have lunch together today so maybe I'll get through the day without going crazy for her. But stay tuned, you never know.

Found
OrwellProject is a blog that appears to be dedicated to reality TV. I'm posting it up here just because of the Orwell connection. I'll check into it more later.