12.05.2005

Someone's Got an Ego

I don't know who Vincent Gallo is (and his IMDB profile didn't help though he appears to specialize in making awful movies and being a drunk) but he's certainly got a rather large idea of how important he is. Otherwise, why would he be offering to sell his sperm for a million bucks? Oh yeah, if you need him to inject it into you, that'll be another $500,000 (and no, there are no gaurantees of mutual satisfaction but I'm guessing he thinks women have orgasms just being near him).

Anyway, want to pay a million bucks for his wank juice? Scroll down to the bottom of this page, Vincent Gallo Merchandise | Miscellaneous, PayPal the money on over and then brace yourself. And, oh boy, he's got an 8 inch penis! Woohoo, but he's not into mulatto children so people of color are not invited. Though he does offer a $50,000 discount to any woman who can prove she's a natural blond and blue eyed babe. And the purchaser cannot use his name.

Um yeah, Vincent Gallo? You're a collosal dutchbag. Have fun wanking into a specimen jar and hawking it. I wonder how much you have to pay him to shave before he does you the honor of having sex with you? Or how much to have him shower? Or brush his teeth?
Via the far too fantastic for words, Gallery of the Absurd.
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